Day 25- Speechless

Can any thing else happen to me this week???? I am all cried out- but I got a chance to squeeze in one more series this afternoon. Yep, I may have SHINGLES folks! Are you f-in kidding me?
I can't believe this. I was all excited to write a funny blog entry this afternoon. You see, I have a rash on my upper left butt cheek area (up on my waist line--right where the bikini line hits) and I was going to write that I thought I picked up something funky trying on bathing suits at Old Navy. Nope. Shitters. Instead, you get to hear how I have been putting Benadryl on my ass since Tuesday because I thought I had a little rash. NOPE. It wasn't getting any better and when I showed it to Fredly, he said "you need to get that checked out". Note: this is Fred's typical response to anything I show him. Look at my finger: "better get it checked out"- look at how swelled my ankle is: "better get it checked out". Well shit fire, I did get it checked out at the Minute Clinic at my local CVS Pharmacy. I wasn't going to bother my G.P. with a simple rash- Ha! Simple rash my ass! (hey that kinda rhymes...ok that's as funny as I might get tonight) So, I go to CVS- my God! There was a line! Are you kidding me? Look, all I wanted to do was drop my capri pants right there in the hallway ass shining and all and say, "Doc, is it a rash? Can you prescribe me anything?" Nope, didn't get that opportunity. I was 3rd in line to see a "Minute Clinic" doctor. So, I waited and when I got in there, she introduced herself and asked me what I was there for. "Well, I have this rash on my butt," I say. Right away she reaches for her purple gloves. "Well, let's take a look."- OK, Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, let's get to it. So I drop my capris and she says, "looks like herpes zoster to me." WHAT? Herpes? "Shingles," she says. OMG. Are you kidding me? Well, I did drop a "you have to be shitting me" at her. You see, I still have band aids on my face from my skin biopsies earlier in the week. Geez, I am a mess. She probably thought the same thing. Well enough of this popsicle stand. I thank her for her time, paid her a $30.00 co-pay for looking at my ass (BTW....I wonder if she noticed it was a little smaller than 25 days ago?? Probably not) and drove home sobbing. I immediately called Fred, who by the way, is on the air. He HATES it when I call and I'm crying. He is a sentimental guy and when I cry, it upsets him. And...it totally screws with his radio show. Here's a guy trying to entertain hundreds of thousands of people trying to get home in ATL rush hour traffic and I'm on hold sobbing. Well, dammit, he's my rock. I need him to tell me it's going to be OK. I also called my mom too. (I'm still a mommies girl and I just need to hear her soothing voice too). Sorry for all my other "peeps" that I called and cried to. I have just had a shitty-ass week. HOLY CRAP BALLS INFINITY! So as soon as I got home, I got on the horn to my kick ass rhumotologist doc. She called me back in less than 5 minutes. She wants to see me first thing tomorrow morning. Come to find out lupus patients, with their suppressed immune system are more susceptible to get shingles (and pneumonia) Good. But crap too. DOUBLE CRAP BALLS for that matter. Tomorrow is supposed to be a celebration day. Tomorrow is my body scan to see how much weight I have lost and all the other cool things (BMI, cholesterol, etc.) that have come off with the cleanse. Well, hold on to puttin on your party hats and tootin your horns. More news to come in tomorrow's blog. Sigh. Glad I can watch Grey's Anatomy season finale tonight. Tonight's episode will probably have a lupus patient come in with skin lesions and shingles. Balls! Ahoj- (Good-bye in Czech)