Day 11- "Patience and fortitude conquer all things"

That's what Ralph Waldo Emerson said- well he's dead and I think that a crock of crap. Well Hi everyone! Can you tell I'm in one of those moods today? No, it's not PMS- that's next week- (wait for those blog entries--those are gonna be good I'm sure). :) No, I'm just frustrated today. I need to stay off the scale and not weigh myself everyday. Here I am bustin my ass, not cheating on this cleanse, drinking 4 shakes and one meal a day and I've plateaued on my weight loss. Now, granted, I am feeling the best I have felt in WEEKS (yay), but dammit, I want to lose weight too! I haven't gained any weight, but haven't lost anymore than the 5.5 lbs. reported on Monday. So first thing this AM I wake up excited to jump on the scale- blah! What the heck? Why am I not losing weight. I must have been swearing like a sailor (and loud) because I woke Fredly up. "Chill out"...he yells, "you gotta be PATIENT". (there's that word again). Sigh....so hi ho hi ho it off to work with my pink lemonade frappes I go and my gallon of aqua. As soon as I get to work, I seek out my dietitian/nutritionist colleague and friend. "Why am I not losing weight???", I plea to her. My god, I almost started crying. She assured me everything is OK and to STOP weighing myself everyday. "Your body is probably still in shock that you went cold turkey and its holding on to every nutrient you put in your body", she says "professionally and clinically". Ok, ok...I will take her word for it. Actually a few other friends and colleagues have told me the same thing. But...for those that know me; am I patient? Hahahahahahhaa! Hell no! I want it YESTERDAY! So on my way home, and I've got to stop at the Doctors Office (Scott Chiropractic...yo yo yo- little shout out to Dr. Dave, Dr. Jane, Abagail, Debbie and Patty) to purchase my 3rd 840 gram tub of lip-smacking pink lemonade cleanse powder. I walked in and they all have just ornery grins on their faces- Why? They have my blog up reading it. Ha! Here's the other kicker (actually 2 kickers:) 1. They want to post my blog link on the office facebook page (sweeeeeet) and 2. Dr. Dave asked me to be a guest speaker at his cleanse/weight loss seminar in two weeks! (Ok...now we're talkin). This snaps me out of my non-weight loss funk right then and there. And...then Dr. Jane comes around the corner and says, "you look great! Your skin looks fantastic!". Really? Gimme a mirror. You know my buddy Rebekah told me the same thing yesterday but I thought she was blowing smoke up my ass to make me feel better. Hmmmm... maybe this cleanse thing really is working. So then I go into my whiny spell, "Dr. Dave, I'm not losing weight!" Here comes the quote of the day: "Well your losing something", he says. What my mind? "You may be seeing any loss in pounds, but when we do the full body scan (which I am now getting for free since I'm a guest speaker) you are going to see huge strides in body percent fat, your BMI and your fluid profile" (whatever the heck he just said). Ok, ok, I'm not going to be a baby anymore about this. I gotta suck it up because tomorrow starts my 3 days of hell: 5 shakes and ZERO food! (omg). AND...to top it off, they give me samples of a new cleanse powder and one I think they've been hiding from me: chai tea and CHOCOLATE? Are you kidding me? You had me at "hello" with a chocolate flavored cleanse powder. "Oh no one likes it", Dr. Dave says. I don't care. I gotta try it. The pink lemonade is almost giving me the gags again. So, I say my good-byes, drive home and make me a chocolate shake for my 4:30 happy hour cocktail. WOW! It's UNBELIEVABLE! It's like the cleanse angels dropped from the heavens and made my shake taste like a peanut buster parfait. It's actually yummy. Granted, it's not a chocolate shake from DQ, but this is gonna get me through the weekend. Tomorrow morning I am taking my pink lemonade powder back to the Dr.'s office and exchanging it for my chocolate bliss. Hot damn! Until tomorrow-- Hagoonea' (Good-bye in Navajo)