Um, you're sick, Coughey McGee!

I used to be guilty of this.  I would go in to work with a nasty cough, snotty ass nose and who knows what else.  I guess working for the CDC for six years now, I have become a germ-a-phobe and have learned not to take your sickness to work and infect others.  I have to be. With sjogrens, my auto immue system just doesn't fight off the nasty bugs like I used to.

FOR INSTANCE, today!  Well, first off, my body has been in total shock today.  Friday is usually a work-from-home day.  I get out of bed with crazy hair and jammies, make a cup of Joe, and get ready to rock and roll from the home office.  Today was not that day.  We had one of our super partners in town conducting a learning academy for college professors that teach health education.  Well, you know I love me some training, so I hopped in the shower, put on my cute clothes with some CUTENESS red heels and headed off to the Airport Westin.  It was great catching up with my training buds before the event started, found a primo spot at a table front and center in the meeting room, got my journal and uniball out ready to take notes, cell phone on vibrate and BAM!  Let's get to the first presenter.

Well, folks start coming in with their college teams in drones and before you know it, the room is packed.  I have a chair next to me open (awesome) just in case my work bag needs a place to rest. (smile)- I look at my table; all the ladies look nornmal- one smiled at me and said hello- I said "hey" back.   Introductions are taking place and our grantee takes a minute to introduce me (since I'm from CDC) and I stand up, make sure my dress isn't up my butt crack, and smile and wave to the group.  As I am sitting back down, a latecomer comes in the back of the meeting room door and is heading right for my empty seat and she is HACKING LIKE A MOFO!  OMG!  Nooooooooo!  Great.  I not only am front-and-center as this table, but now I'm at The Walking Dead Hackville Table.  Not only is Coughey McGee hacking up a lung, but so are her other teammates.  Hooooleeee balls.  Really?  So I squint to see where they are from.  New York.  Really?  So you are avoiding the major blizzard of the year here in the ATL but you brought all your nasty ass germs with you? Thank you soooo much!  So while they continue to cough, I have to shoot a stare at all three of them with the following eye-contact message:  If you pieces of dog crap get me sick, I am going to drive back in to the city tomorrow and kick each one of your assess all across this Westin!!  Well, I must have scared one of them because she dug in her purse and gave everyone coughing a cough drop.  Really?  You think that is going to save the world?  A halls cough drop?  Well, Coughey McGee can't even get it down.  She opens her mouth and this cough that comes deep from her bowels and sounds like 5 pounds of flem is connected to it comes out of her mouth.  OMG.  I look straight at her and she's sweating like a whore in church.  Hell, she probably has a fever too!  I'm telling you....if I get sick, there will be hell to pay!   I can hear the three of them whispering to "Coughey" to "you should probably go upstairs and rest".  Really?  Hey, I have a follow-up question:  Why did you even come?  Well now I am so paranoid that I'm going to get the clap, that I hear what seems to be every fricking person in that room coughing.  OMG.  I'm not going to come out of this room alive.  Well, I had had enough.  I leaned over to "Coughey" (within speaking distance- I didn't want to get too close), and like I had a special CDC germ badge told her, "You know, if you are sick, you probably don't want to spread your contageous germs to everyone else in this room.  Sorry, but I really don't want to be sick myself."  BAM.   That's all it took.  Coughey left the meeting.    Be gone sinus-infection, flem coughing, sweaty infected person!   I'm sorry, but come on!!!  Obviously she was way sick.  And, for that, I get another star on my "Bitch of the Year" badge.  Oh well, at least I looked good.  Everyone in that training will thank me at a later time for this intervention.  Now, off to go do my netti pot and chug some nyquil.